I Have Doper Mind Control, Bruseghin wins Giro HTT

May 25 2007

Oh, man – I am so excited. For the past two days I have been rocking some major mind-control powers on dope confessions. I say “maybe Zabel will own up to it” – boom. Zabel owns up to it. I comment it’s time for Bjarne to come clean – boom. Bjarne comes clean. So who’s next up? I say none other than Lance-f***ing-Armstrong.

Come on, Big Tex, step up to the plate. Or do you still claim to have “nothing to confess”, just like everyone else who just came clean used to say? I mean, it’s not like the TdF is gonna revoke any of your titles – Bjarne’s offered to give his back, but check out the rest of the ’96 GC – Jan Ullrich? Richard Virenque? Laurent Dufaux? It’s a rogues’ gallery of doper convicts. All your runners-up, with the exception of Andreas Kloden – whose roller-coaster results arouse plenty of suspicion for me – are neck deep in allegations and convictions as well.

But for those of you who feel this proves the sport is irretrievably immersed in drugs, this year’s Giro is unfolding in a convoluted enough fashion that one could glean some notion of cleanliness from it. The winner of today’s uphill TT was Marzio Bruseghin. Yeah, I was like “Marzio who?”, too. But he’s the Italian TT champ, and has been doing his time as a domestique for long enough to explain his lack of wins. He’s also a survivor of the canned corn-busting breakaway from earlier in the week, which currently puts him in second overall. Not that anyone’s looking like they can crack DiLuca (3rd on the stage, +8 sec) at the moment, but it only takes one bad day to lose the Giro.

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