Pro Cycling News – Bad Kit Colors, The Lance Movie, JCTDU

Jan 16 2006

It looks to be another banner year for lens-grinders. My brief jubilation that Quick.Step had darkened their ’06 team kit was crushed today when I realized that Liberty Seguros has done the exact same thing. And I mean exact, right down to the white patches on the shoulder. So get those new perscription glasses now, or you’ll squint yourself blind trying to tell the teams apart before you even reach the Giro. This is proof, folks, that Skull and Bones does not run the world. I mean, how hard would it be for the Bonesman that runs Liberty Mutual to call up whatever Bonesman is in charge of Quick.Step and say “we’re thinking of going with a darker blue next season, so don’t do that.” Clearly, Skull and Bones is not nearly as influential as many people think (though both teams’ new colors do look very familiar…).

I just figured I’d debunk the conspiracy theorists before announcing that Lance Armstrong has dodged yet another legal attack. Between my French and Babelfish’s pseudo-English, it seems like Armstrong has gotten himself out of any hot water regarding the Simeoni Affar, at least as far courts in France are concerned. The seven-time Tour winner has also snagged headlines (scroll down – yes, I am aware this isn’t actually a headline) for endorsing Matt Damon to play him in an upcoming film. “[Damon] can dig into it on the athletic side and the illness side,” notes the Texan, “but he’ll also look (I guess) and ride (ok…) and feel (what?!) like a professional cyclist.”

For those of you who are sick of the stories linked to above, fear not: actual racing is almost upon us again. How can I tell? No, it’s not the Giro announcements, or the speculative editorials, but the stories on how Thor Hushovd (scroll down) likes Australians. You think he’s gonna say he likes any Australians during the actual season? Of course not. But why would he even mention the Land Down Under if it weren’t time for the Jacob’s Creek Tour Down Under? Oh, and I guess having the JCTDU previews come out helps, too. Anyway, guys, even though it’s 12 degrees outside with a foot of fresh powder blown up against the back door, It’ll be Het Volk before you know it.

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